FRIDAY 13 APRIL 2007 – 21 TODAY (NOT)

Another Friday the thirteenth and, as last time, nothing unlucky has happened to me today apart from having to make my second visit this week to the orangery! My daughter is still home and my son too so I am being eaten out of house and home! So, here I am again. Before I start, I forgot to mention on Tuesday that at the bottom of the 2004 bill (that I used for my SPRINTY index) there was a Petrol Discount voucher. I asked Mr Sleepy the cashier for my petrol voucher and he looked at me strangely (most people do) and said ‘No promotion at moment’ (he is not of these shores). Frankly, after the Kids Vouchers huge miscalculation and all the yawning I don’t believe him, so next week (I forgot this week) I’m going to ask again for a petrol voucher and see what happens. Talking of promotions I took another look at the Special Offers board (still by the fish counter) only to find it was … totally obscured by a Hovis loaf cardboard container. This is not to say that Hovis loafs (or is it loaves?) are made out of cardboard (but then again …) only that there was an empty promotion (I presume) display thingy in front of the board. Based on my experience of Sainsbury’s promotions thus far I cannot believe that this promotion actually worked and all the loafs (loaves) were sold, but you never know! Next, booze. I now carry round my green re-usable bags in my trolley and I bought some beer and wine but as my trolley was somewhat full (for the hungry hoard) I put the beer and the wine into the bags. I half expected alarms to go off and to be surrounded by surly security men (some customers I’m sure would like this but not me) but nothing happened. Of course, I was honest and took them out at the checkout but I bet many don’t and I suspect they just walk through the checkout without paying. Can it really be that easy? I must check out checkout security sometime and report back. I looked again in vain for English wine this week without success. I thought someone of note (Mr King perhaps?) was reading this diary but perhaps not as Sainsbury’s still prefer to stock horrible wines like Liebfraumilch and Piesporter (Pissporter, more like) in preference to our own home grown stuff, but there you go. Anyway, I did buy some Mouton Cadet at 25% off, so all was well. This is made/brewed/trodden by Chateau Mouton Rothschild in the Bordeaux region of France. The real stuff is unbelievably expensive (and red) but the people’s offering of Mouton Cadet is pretty good. Did you know that each year a famous artist is commissioned to design the label for the Chateau Mouton Rothschild posh stuff? Picasso, Warhol, Kandinsky, Bacon et al. Interesting! Anyway, my daughter asked for some low fat olive oil (isn’t this an oxymoron?) and I searched high and low for it. I have to say that there is a bewildering display of olive oils (or is it olives oil?) with some bizarre names – I noted Picual, Hojiblanca and Kalamata to name but a few. These are either the olive variety or where they come from, I can’t remember, but, whatever, good for Sainsbury’s on some clear food labelling for once! And if they can do it with olive oil, then why not the ready meals I ask myself? Now, one thing I found hard to resist was the Dyson Animal hoover. This is a hoover that, bizarrely, is designed to pick up animal hairs but quite why one was for sale in my Sainsbury’s I have no idea. Clearly no-one else does too as even with £110 (yes, £110) off it was still sitting forlornly on the shelves. Frankly I can’t see it being there much longer and I expect it will go the way of the duvets, plates, wooden boxes etc in due course. I’ll keep an eye on it and let you know. On to the check out. I got in the queue for aisle 20 (it was busy today) quite near to the lectern (I presume this comes out at busy times, like today lunchtime) and I heard the lecturer (he who mans the lectern) say “John (or somesuch name) … 21 please”. Aha, I thought if I hang back I can be first into aisle 21 and out quicker. Anyway, John (or whoever) eventually turns up and logs on and fiddles with the cash drawer and all the usual kind of timewasting stuff and by the time he was ready I had had to put my stuff on the aisle 20 receiving area (not sure of the technical name for this). Damn! My cunning plan has been foiled! Anyway, it was worth going through this aisle as the cashier turned the moving belt on without being asked (the first time in ages) and then kindly asked if I preferred it on or off. "On please" I said - absence makes the heart grow fonder! And she nearly got the Kids Vouchers right (£68 should get me 6 but I got 7) but why she got it wrong I’m not sure as I’ve just noticed that for the first time there is a Kids Vouchers bit on the bottom of the bill which tells the cashier precisely how many to give out. Maybe they are deliberately ignoring this and giving out as a many vouchers as possible? And if they are, good for them! And on that (belt) moving note that’s it for this week (I hope – two visits are more than enough … ). Sorry, not quite it, I've thought of another slogan for the Coinstar machine - how about 'Relieve pressure on your groin, get rid of all that coin'. No? Well, give me some credit for trying ...

Items bought 39

Cost £68.49
Average cost per item £1.75
Checkout number 20

Nectar points 1198
Active Kids vouchers 32 (still no e-mails asking for these!)