FRIDAY 12 JANUARY 2007 – OFF MY TROLLEY?

At last! Back to my old routine of a Friday shop. It’s been a while since I’ve been in on a Friday and I’d forgotten how busy it is at lunchtime. Actually the aisles were OK, but the checkouts were … well, more of them later. And, before you ask, my pants are in good order this week so last week’s ‘shop till they drop’ problems have not recurred. But, notwithstanding (how about that for a word!) this I had a bit of a panic attack on the way in – no money and so no way of releasing a trolley from its mates! And, whilst carrying a basket has the attraction of being able to go through a check out I’ve not been through before the prospect of lugging a heavier and heavier basket round Sainsbury’s is not good news. So, I have to go on safari to find a trolley that has been sent to Coventry (or wherever trolleys get sent) by its chums and, amazingly, I find one. Not lurking in a dark corner, no, at the top of the escalator where I literally walk straight into it! How lucky was that! So, suitably armed I start to shop and almost immediately run into my first beef of the year - potatoes. Hithertofore (another cracker) I’ve bought Sainbsury’s loose baking potatoes (the big buggers near the floor). But as I have an awful sneaking feeling that they are really expensive (I’ll run some checks next time to prove this) I tried to buy some normal loose potatoes. But, guess what! They don’t sell any. So, I had to buy a made up bag which I don’t like doing because as sure as eggs is eggs (or perhaps spuds is spuds) you pay more for the cost of cleaning them and bagging them up. I know loose potatoes are muddy, mucky things but come on Sainsbury’s get some in – we can take it! Next, mince pies. My bluff has been called – whatever stocks there were have been removed. Damn! Mind you, they did have some ‘Mince Puffs’ in Christmassy boxes but, frankly, I didn’t like the sound of them … Neither did anybody else it seems as the stack was beautifully symmetrical and clearly untouched. What strikes me as odd, however, is I don’t recall seeing these before Christmas (they would have surely caught my eye with a name like that) so how come they are on sale now? Maybe Sainsbury’s are stocking up for next Christmas already! I’ll keep an eye on them in the coming weeks – my guess is that the whole lot will suddenly disappear. Now, here’s something really interesting. What I thought was my plain ordinary trolley is in fact a ‘MK1 70 LTR Daily Shopper’! Over Christmas, sad person that I am, I did a bit of roaming around on the internet and found a company called Clares that makes supermarket trolleys (someone has to). And looking through their product range (I thought I might buy one at the end of my year as a souvenir) I came across the MK1 70 etc which looked remarkably like my friends at Sainsbury’s. And Clares count Sainsbury’s amongst their customers! So, today I compared my trolley with a picture of a MK1 70 etc (other customers eyed me with suspicion) and it’s exactly the same apart from a sticky up raised bit at the top of the flap that goes up when they mate (I presume there is a technical term for this – answers on a postcard please). And it’s an impressive bit of kit with a ‘round nose’ ‘travelator castors’ and ‘electroplated zinc with clear passivation & lacquer coated finish’. Wow. I will treat my trolleys (sorry MK1 70 etcs) with much more respect in future … Right, on to the check outs. Today the checker outer was called Putin or something like that (pollonium anyone?) and he had real trouble with his equipment (scales, moving belt etc) and then he ran out of £1 coins so the upshot was I had my longest ever check out experience. Bring back the pre-Christmas girl with the lectern I say! Whilst waiting I had another look at the Sainsbury’s amazing offers leaflets (not) and I noted that there are 2 left for me to have a go at, sorry, critically appraise – credit cards and travel insurance. Well, I don’t do credit cards really (lucky me) so I’ll pass on that one and as I’m not planning to go anywhere exciting just yet (unless Swindon counts?) I don’t need to check out the travel insurance offer. Something to look forward to later in the year perhaps! Finally, I noticed some big banners announcing ‘The Big Five Drive’ which is something to do with the 5 vegetables a day that we are all supposed to eat (baked beans don’t count – they’re pulses). Unfortunately I saw this too late to be able to do any investigating but, as luck would have it, as I returned to my car I saw a discarded scratch card type thing on the floor in the Big 5 green (naturally) livery so I picked it up. The (very) small print on the back says that every customer who spends more than £10 should be given one gamecard when they check out. You then tear it open in a frenzy of excitement to be told either, like this one, ‘Sorry you haven’t won this time’ or, presumably, something like ‘Congratulations you have won this time’, in which it case it seems you hand the winning card to the cashier and then you get one of your vegetable purchases free! It was disappointing that Putin didn’t give me a card (his mind was elsewhere understandably) but I’m looking forward to getting one of these every week. What isn’t clear is how it all works, because presumably you have to go through the checkout to confirm you have spent over £10 and then, if you’ve won, presumably you have to rummage amongst your packed up shopping and compare it with the till roll so as to be able to locate the most expensive vegetable bought and presumably then the cashier has to do some kind of refund transaction which presumably means a manager authorisation and then presumably you are handed the princely sum of 47p! I predict a riot … And, much more interesting, how is this all dealt with in the Nectar points statement? Don’t go there … Wish me luck!

Items bought 27
Cost £46.74
Cost per item £1.73
Checkout number 11
Nectar Points balance 1006 (back in business again!)