THURSDAY 1 FEBRUARY 2007 - PARKING & BARKING

Great excitement in the car park today! As I was going in there was an Enterprise rent-a-van going out through the in! Now, when you go in the in you go in on the outside but after you've gone in the in you have to go from the outside into the inside and as the van was too tall to go into the inside he had to turn round and go back out the in. And to guide him out was a smartly dressed young man with a walkie talkie (are they still called this?) who was somewhat vertically challenged (but not so much that he would fit inside the barrier machine ... ). Not only all of this but also there was much consternation in the queue for the exit barrier as someone had skidded and I think run into the car in front. So, another smartly dressed young man with a walkie talkie was getting some grief from a Jaguar driver. Now what have I been saying about the deteriorating road surface for the last few months? Remember, you heard (read) it here first! I feel a letter or a phone call to the car park owners coming on. Phew - after all this drama and trauma shopping in Sainsbury's was bound to be a bit of a let down but actually there was quite a bit going on this week. First, the boxes. Gone. As I predicted, they presumably didn't sell and they've been sent to the great sawmill in the sky. But, ever entrepreneurial, Sainsbury's have replaced them with ... a pile of duvets! Wherever is all this stuff coming from? Eastern Europe, perhaps, with the Basics deliveries? Next, Sainsbury's is going the dogs! No, not really, in fact dogs are going to Sainsbury's - there was a man with a rucksack with a tiny dog (not sure of the breed) peeking out of it. Very cute, but surely only guide dogs are allowed in the store? Luckily it didn't bark otherwise goodness only knows what would have happened. One for the Health & Safety boys, I feel. Much mirth at the cheese & ham counter today. A customer's mobile phone rang, nothing unusual about that but it had the 'diddle dee dee dee, diddle dee dee dee, diddle dee dee dee' ring tone (the one you hear most often and the most annoying) but the phone's battery must have been nearly out of charge as the key, pitch or whatever got slower and lower as the tune progressed. It sounded really good - "I want that one" as Andy from Little Britain says! Now, prawns. I decided to buy some to go with my avocado (my weekly treat). I decided against the 'Basics' as they looked a little undernourished and instead alighted on some large juicy looking ones which I was dismayed to read had been 'cultivated in Indonesia, Ecuador, Honduras or Nicaragua'. Good grief! Talk about Sainsbury's hedging their bets! Why not just say 'from anywhere other than the UK' and be done with it? Not sure about them being 'cultivated' either, this has a 'modified' ring to it don't you think? And as Indonesia and the Central American countries are on opposite sides of the world where do all these prawns meet up prior to being packed for Sainsbury's? The little known country of Crustacea presumably! Whilst in the check out queue I noticed a new leaflet, this time advertising Sainsbury's Energy. I had no idea that Sainsbury's were buying and selling gas and electricity (can anybody do this I wonder?) but, needless to say, I picked up a copy of the leaflet. I was expecting the usual comparisons with other suppliers but I was misstaken! Instead Sainsbury's simply say that not only will 'you will enjoy competitive energy prices' but also 'you could earn up to 6200 Nectar points in the first year' and this is followed by a complicated table which shows how you could indeed earn up to 6200 Nectar points in the first year. Now, as you now know 500 Nectar points are equivalent to £2.50, so 6200 points will save you the princely sum of £31.00. But, having said that, £31.00 is £31.00 so I will check out the offering in more detail and report back. I still haven't bought my shares in Sainsbury's yet and, my goodness, I should have done as they went up by 13% today! Some talk of Sainsbury's being bought for their prime locations (alas, not the one I shop in unfortunately) but, of course, the real reason is that having learned about my intention to invest all my readers have piled in to the stock thereby forcing up the price. Fame at last! Well, that's just about it for this week apart from to report that I yet again didn't win a prize in 'The Big 5 Drive'. So much for every other person winning - that's 3 times I've not won.

Items bought 33

Cost £47.84

Cost per item £1.44

Checkout number 16

Nectar Points balance 246 (1000 cashed in for an 'Instant Reward' as it says on my bill. Sounds interesting!)